Okay, so I saw this wild thing online about a female football commentator with a super screechy voice, and I just had to try and mimic it. I mean, who wouldn’t want to annoy their friends and family, right?
Step 1: The Research (aka Listening to the Horror)
First, I spent like an hour just listening to recordings of this commentator. I tried to record some example but I found it so difficult. It was painful, honestly. But I needed to understand the essence of the screech. It’s not just high-pitched, it’s got this weird, like, nasal quality too. And the way she drags out certain words… pure gold (if gold was incredibly irritating).
Step 2: The Warm-Up (My Throat Hated Me)
I figured I couldn’t just jump into full screech mode. I’m no professional voice actor, and I didn’t want to, you know, permanently damage my vocal cords. So, I started with some basic vocal exercises. You know, the usual “me-me-me” and “la-la-la” stuff. Then I gradually started raising the pitch. Think of a cat slowly getting angrier. That’s the vibe.
- Basic humming
- Scale exercises (going higher and higher)
- Practicing nasal sounds (holding my nose and talking – looked ridiculous)
Step 3: The Screeching Begins
This is where it got real. I took a deep breath and tried to channel my inner screeching football commentator. I focused on:
- Pitch: As high as I could go without cracking.
- Nasality: Really pushing the sound through my nose.
- Word Elongation: Drawing out vowels like “goooooaaaaalllll!”
- Volume:Loud, very loud.
My first few attempts were… rough. I sounded more like a strangled goose than anything else. But I kept at it, adjusting my pitch, my nasality, everything. I recorded myself a few times to see if I was getting closer. It was embarrassing to listen back to, but hey, progress!
Step 4: The Perfect Annoying Moment
Finally, I felt like I had something usable. It wasn’t perfect, but it was definitely annoying enough. I waited for the perfect moment – a family gathering where everyone was watching a football game. And then, during a particularly exciting play, I unleashed the screech.
The reactions were priceless. My sister jumped, my dad groaned, and my mom just gave me that “what have I done to deserve this” look. Success!
So, yeah, that’s how I spent my afternoon. Was it productive? Probably not. Was it fun (for me)? Absolutely. Would I recommend it? Only if you’re prepared to be the most annoying person in the room. I have to improve this skill!
