Alright, listen up, y’all. You wanna know how to get your booze into a football game without them nosy security folks catchin’ ya? Well, I’ve heard some things, seen some things, and I’m gonna spill the beans. It ain’t rocket science, but ya gotta be a bit sneaky, ya know?
First off, don’t be stupid. Don’t go waltzin’ in there with a whole dang bottle stickin’ outta your pocket. They ain’t blind, ya know. You gotta be smart about it.
Now, one thing folks do, and it seems kinda clever, is they use those little flasks. You know, the flat ones that fit right in your pocket? Yeah, those. Fill ‘er up with whatever tickles your fancy – whiskey, rum, whatever. Just make sure it’s sealed tight, ya don’t want no leaks. That’d be a waste of good drinkin’ liquor, and it’d give ya away faster than a rooster crowin’ at sunrise.
- One fella I heard about, he poured his booze right into a sunscreen bottle. Cleaned it out good first, of course. Nobody’s gonna question a sunscreen bottle at a football game, right? But there ya go, hidin’ your hooch in plain sight. Smart, ain’t it?
- And then there’s the ol’ soda bottle trick. Get yourself a big ol’ soda, drink some of it down, then top it off with your liquor. Looks just like a regular soda, see? But it’s got a little kick to it. Just don’t go offerin’ it to any kids, ya hear? That ain’t right.
- Oh, and I almost forgot! Some folks use these here bladder bags, the kind ya use for water or whatever. They just fill ‘em up with their drink and hide ‘em under their shirts. Just gotta be careful ya don’t poke a hole in it, or you’ll be soakin’ wet and smellin’ like a distillery.
Now, some folks get real fancy with it. I heard tell of these fellas who make jello shots, but they ain’t just regular jello shots. They make ‘em real strong and then they hide ‘em in little plastic bags. They say ya can just slip ‘em right into your pockets, and nobody’s the wiser. Seems like a lot of work to me, but hey, if it gets ya your drink, who am I to judge?
Another thing you gotta think about is where you put this stuff. Pockets are good, but they’re also the first place them security folks gonna look. So ya gotta get creative. I’ve heard of ladies hidin’ little bottles in their…well, you know… And fellas, they might try tuckin’ a flask into their boots or somethin’. Just make sure it ain’t uncomfortable, ya don’t wanna be waddlin’ around like a duck with a sore foot.
But look here, the most important thing is to act natural. Don’t be fidgety, don’t be lookin’ around all nervous. Just walk in there like ya own the place, like you ain’t got nothin’ to hide. ‘Cause if ya look guilty, they’re gonna be all over ya like flies on honey.
And one more thing, don’t be greedy. Just bring enough for yourself and maybe a friend or two. Don’t go tryin’ to smuggle in enough booze to supply the whole dang stadium. That’s just askin’ for trouble.
So there ya have it. A few little tricks to help ya sneak your liquor into a football game. Now, I ain’t sayin’ ya should do it, and I ain’t sayin’ it’s right. But if you’re gonna do it, at least be smart about it. And remember, drink responsibly, ya hear? We don’t want nobody gettin’ themselves into trouble.
Now get out there and enjoy the game, and maybe a little somethin’ extra too!
Tags：football, alcohol, sneak, stadium, flask, drinks, tips, tricks, game day
